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I've always had mix feelings about the whole 'my boyfriend/hubby is my best friend' concept. Don't get me wrong: I do acknowledge the crucial importance of the friendship component on any mature and romantic relationship - the fun, the rapport, the honesty, the comfort, the intimacy...My point is that, once you are in a committed relationship with your significant other -involving a great deal of sharing and compromising- I still think that referring to him/her as 'my best friend' falls a bit short.
The reason why I want to write about it, is because two of the males I love and admire the most in the world told me the same thing 'your significant other has to be your best friend.' Is it just a matter of a 'label' or is there much more? Down the road -as in years and decades into a relationship- is friendship what hold couples together?
During the first years of relationship -on the honeymoon-ish phase...- is it be good idea to open a 'friendship account' and maintain a healthy balance so that it can transfer funds to the 'romantic account' when it hits red numbers?
I would love to have you guys weighting in...
Wow! what a great post...you've really got me thinking. I do think the solid friendship holds a couple together when they are out of the honeymoon phase. Or, as a therapist friend once put it, the "drunk love" phase. I think in this sense the "best friend" term has a slightly different definition. When referring to a boyfriend or hubby I think it means a profound closeness, comfort level, trust, and intimacy beyond romance.
ReplyDeleteI am definitely an advocate of still maintaining our best friendships with our gal pals because men and woman are so fundamentally different and there is so much that our guys just won't get no matter how much they adore us.
Great post sweetie and enjoy your time with you love!!!!
XO, Gina
http://classyeverafter.blogspot.com
Referring to your husband/significant other as your best friend has become out of vogue for most, but face it, there are so many types of love, and phases therein, can we just let go of our battle for independence long enough to look honestly at what these special people truly mean to us? I have lots of friends, some of them besties, but only one husband, and it's for eternity if you remember the vows.
ReplyDeleteXO,
Jane
What a great question. I'm not quite sure where I stand on the issue, actually. I think it's important to be friends with you SO, obviously, but best friends? Not sure that's healthy...
ReplyDeleteMy husband is my best friend, so yes :)) Xx
ReplyDeleteI truly married my best friend. I can still say that. The friendship component is what carries you through the tough times.
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